Get Involved to Cure Loneliness

The holidays are not a happy time for everyone. For many people who are separated from their families or who have lost a partner, the holidays are a lonely time. Seeing other families gathering together augments their feelings of loss. The burden of loneliness can feel particularly heavy during the holidays.

Rather than dwell on your loneliness, reach out to others. "Loneliness is often caused by wanting people to do something for us," explains psychologist Hap LeCrone. "When we do things for other people, we are rarely lonely."

Here are some things you can do to combat loneliness during the holidays (and all year round):

• Reach out. If a friend or acquaintance is also alone this holiday, invite them over for a cup of coffee or a bite to eat. Go to a movie together or out shopping to see the mall decorations.
• Volunteer. Serve food at the local soup kitchen, take small gifts and visit with the elderly in nursing homes, drive seniors to doctor appointments, deliver Meals on Wheels, help out at the local food pantry. Check with your church or local volunteer bureau; volunteers are particularly needed during the holidays.
• Re-connect with friends. Call someone you haven't talked with in a while and catch up on the news. Send a newsy card or email to an older relative. Invite a neighbor over for coffee.
• Get involved. Take a class or start a hobby. Think of something you've always wanted to do and get out there and do it.
• Get moving. Loneliness can lead to depression and nothing fights depression better than exercise. Join a gym, take a swim class, join a walking group, sign up for the park district volleyball team, join the yoga class at the senior center. Nothing creates a friendly bond like sweating together!
• Help others. The best cure for loneliness is to do something for other people. Giving of yourself lightens your load and theirs. You can find ways to reach out even if you're housebound. Organize a small phone network of other homebound people through your local church or senior services. Take turns checking on each other and sharing news.

When you give of yourself to others, you stop thinking about how difficult your own life is. If you're lonely this holiday, do something to help other people and reap the joy that comes from giving of yourself.